Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Well...im sure fairy tales were made up to frighten the hell of of small children anyway.
I was brought up on a diet of Hilaire Belloc, Fungus the Bogeyman & mis-read brothers Grimme which may explain my take on Goldie locks & the other fairy tales.

As I See it.

Prince Charming should have got off with at least one of the ugly sisters first in case the whole Cinderella thing didn't work out. Lets face it , a girl who can't even look after her own shoes. Hows that going to go down in the royal household? Probably be lying dead in a French tunnel within the first year of marraige. Then back to the ugly girl. Oh wait....sorry Charles.

Repunzal should have sustained major problems with split ends, hair far too long. Kinda wished it would have pulled out as matey climbed up.

Rumplestiltskin would have been beaten at his own game when his details were Googled and his name guessed on the first go.

Red Riding Hood. Hmm... a tale that first has a paedophile stalker in the shape of wolf. Then we have a element of breaking & entry + Granny bashing in the background. Next comes the full on wolfy transvestism and finally and axe weilding woods man.
No we will keep this one as it is.

Sleeping beauty.....Prince your kissing a dead girl. Thats necrophillia ! eew, Yick.
Ok so she wakes up from the dead. Why can't she be a propper zombie & go on a brain feeding rampage?

The Frog and the Princess. Apart from hoping the silly princess just ended up with horrid, sticky frog lips. I feel she should have boxed the talking frog and sold him to the media for a quick buck.

....and so on.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Very nice! What about the Princess and the Pea? :)